it is the beginning of 2013. And I don't think I am all that excited about it now. Before I was all about it. Super stoked. Ready to concur all that comes my way. But now, that has changed.
As 2012 was coming to an end I looked back on my year. I had a ton of personal accomplishments. Overall 2012 was good. Sure, I had a rough time. It was not all rainbows and sunshine. Not even close. But as my mentor, Alyson, asked me how I was doing spiritually and where I am at I had to think. And it wasn't until then when I realized where I really was on my walk with Jesus.
Matthew 7:13-14, “Enter through the narrow gate. For wide is the gate and broad is the road that leads to destruction, and many enter through it. But small is the gate and narrow the road that leads to life, and only a few find it."
As 2012 was coming to an end I looked back on my year. I had a ton of personal accomplishments. Overall 2012 was good. Sure, I had a rough time. It was not all rainbows and sunshine. Not even close. But as my mentor, Alyson, asked me how I was doing spiritually and where I am at I had to think. And it wasn't until then when I realized where I really was on my walk with Jesus.
Matthew 7:13-14, “Enter through the narrow gate. For wide is the gate and broad is the road that leads to destruction, and many enter through it. But small is the gate and narrow the road that leads to life, and only a few find it."
This verse nailed it. especially the last part. "...narrow the road that leads to life.."
I'm walking on a narrow road. Long and narrow. And hard. few find it. I imagine my self walking this road and just stopping. Not lost. Not giving up nor turning back. Just stopping. Looking back, seeing what I walked, what I went through, then looking ahead and seeing what is yet to come. And that I am no where near being close to finish. It has also hit me that living my life for Christ is hard. To make the decision everyday to live my life for Him, and walk as He walked.
I am at a point in my life where I am facing my challenges. I know what I want and that is to live my life for Christ. No matter how hard it is. I am slowly starting to finally accept that the Lord loves me for me, regardless of my mistakes. Life is getting harder. And I am scared. I am not looking forward to 2013 only because I am turning 23. I am getting closer and closer to being a super legit adult, still jobless and facing the fact that I am no where near where I thought I would be 10 years ago. And this scares me. But because of what I just said in the paragraph before this, all I can do is take a deep breath, do a few stretches, maybe some lunges, and continue walking, with full faith that the Lord is going to continue to guide me through this narrow path.
I'm walking on a narrow road. Long and narrow. And hard. few find it. I imagine my self walking this road and just stopping. Not lost. Not giving up nor turning back. Just stopping. Looking back, seeing what I walked, what I went through, then looking ahead and seeing what is yet to come. And that I am no where near being close to finish. It has also hit me that living my life for Christ is hard. To make the decision everyday to live my life for Him, and walk as He walked.
I am at a point in my life where I am facing my challenges. I know what I want and that is to live my life for Christ. No matter how hard it is. I am slowly starting to finally accept that the Lord loves me for me, regardless of my mistakes. Life is getting harder. And I am scared. I am not looking forward to 2013 only because I am turning 23. I am getting closer and closer to being a super legit adult, still jobless and facing the fact that I am no where near where I thought I would be 10 years ago. And this scares me. But because of what I just said in the paragraph before this, all I can do is take a deep breath, do a few stretches, maybe some lunges, and continue walking, with full faith that the Lord is going to continue to guide me through this narrow path.
This is where I am at.
Goodbye 2012, It was nice. I went through a lot, learned a lot about myself and the Lord, had some make ups and break ups, spent more time with friends I hardly saw the previous year, aced my math class, and got some pretty stellar Christmas gifts.
Hello 2013, be gentle. Lord teach me more about you, develop the gifts you have given me, grow my heart, prepare me for Bolivia, provide time for me to mentor, and keep me focused on your plans for my life and not my own.
♥L
Goodbye 2012, It was nice. I went through a lot, learned a lot about myself and the Lord, had some make ups and break ups, spent more time with friends I hardly saw the previous year, aced my math class, and got some pretty stellar Christmas gifts.
Hello 2013, be gentle. Lord teach me more about you, develop the gifts you have given me, grow my heart, prepare me for Bolivia, provide time for me to mentor, and keep me focused on your plans for my life and not my own.
♥L
